Every Christian Music Video - John Crist (Official Music Video)

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Ever notice how every Christian music video looks the exact same? Well here's a music video that encapsulates them all!

John Crist is a standup comedian. His second parody song, Every Christian Music Video is available now wherever you get your music!

LYRICS:
verse one is always shot in black and white
an unhappy couple in the middle of a fight
she’s looking at a photo
he’s looking out the window
rain drops always make things much more sad
that doesn’t even rhyme though

nobody knows what the fights about today
but it must be something serious
there’s lots of bills to pay
a mildly attractive actress is a must
but not to hot to make them men stumble or lust

three chords and a mid tempo
gonna try to rhyme this i know
and if we can’t then we’ll just sing ooooh
is there cussing in the song? Heck no!
Cause its safe for the family
positive, encouraging radio
this is ever christian music video

verse two he’s climbing in his truck and leaving
becky’s stays at home and she’s overwhelmed and grieving
he’s p****ing a liquor store oh no
pill bottles on the floor
so we can’t show a christian drinking a beer but prescription drug abuse is actually way worse so that doesn’t really make any sense anyway but ok
its mainly soccer moms listening to us
so we had to make it clear that its the man who things up, I said messed

three chords and a mid tempo
found this on vrbo
here’s a diversity cameo another one
is there cussing in the song, heck no
cause its safe for the family
positive encouraging radio
this is every christian music video

he finds a bible when he opens up the drawer
and somehow now he’s in a church from 1864
the moral of the story is it works out in the end
cause he tells her that he loves her and he’ll never sin again
yeah he tells her that he loves her and he’ll never sin again amen

three chords and a mid tempo
v neck so my tattoos show
everybody’s singing in a happy home
did they see a therapist heck no
but they’re back in church front row
looking perfect in the instagram post
this is every christian music video

John on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/johnbcrist/
John on Tiktok: https://www.tiktok.com/@johncristcomedian?lang=en
John on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/johnbcrist/

CREDITS:
Written by: John Crist & Steve Fee
Produced by: Steve Fee
Mixed/Mastered by: Jack Nellis

CAST:
Lead Singer: John Crist
Man: Isaiah Stratton
Woman: Halle Rebecca Sullivan
Acoustic Guitar: Steve Fee
B**** Guitar: Andrew Simmons
Lead Guitar: Logan Rice
Drums: Andrew Layne
Daughters: Abby-Jones Nicholson & Ruth-Michael Nicholson
Diversity Cameo #1 - Shama Mrema
Diversity Cameo #2 - David Pizarro

CREW:
Executive Producer: John Crist
Producer: Shama Mrema
Director: Robert Isaac
Director of Photography: Brian French
1st AC: Marshall Hammer
2nd AC: Bradley Hamilton
Gaffer: Doug Smith
G&E Swing: Brandon Riddell
Hair & Makeup: Diana Valerie
Associate Producer: Tony Palacino
Transportation: Ken Hagerman
Editor: Shama Mrema
Colorist: Tyler Goodwin

Special Thanks to Gabriel & Laura Valk, Village Anglican Church, Heather Esch, Bridge City Coffee, Mike & Jeff’s BBQ, and Chris and Sarah Nicholson